That was the key verse as our Pastor began his sermon this morning, speaking on the amazing grace of God as we examined His character. One of the things I really appreciate about His unconditional grace, His unlimited grace, (Ephesians 3:18-20) and His unending grace, (2 Thessalonians 2:16) is that He hasn't finished with me yet. For all the times I have let Him, friends, family and strangers down, I comfort myself that I will meet in Heaven with those who know Him , and we will have eternity to make up for lost time. What an encouragement for me, as I have to live with the consequences of my persistent procrastination.
Beyond friendship was my relationship with our grandmother, She showered me, my handicapped sister, and my younger brother, with true love, and many practical indications of it. With her hands never idle, we were never short of jerseys, socks, mittens and scarves, lovingly laboured on in the candlelit evenings in her little white washed cottage. She had no electricity in those days; there was a long drop in the garden, and a “cold safe” to keep milk, meat and butter at a cool temperature. Those were her equivalent of modern technologies. Her pies filled with gooseberries, or raspberry and apple, or whatever was the most profuse in her little garden, were baked in her little paraffin stove and appreciated each week when she visited us on Tuesdays and Thursdays for her shopping outings. There were always sweets in her pockets, and she never forgot our favourites. When I left, her caring continued, sadly taken for granted most of the time as although she was so greatly appreciated, I expected her to know it without being told. Her last letter is treasured but she never received an answer! Procrastination with irredeemable results!
My father was so proud of me, and carried photos of his family in Africa , always ready to bring out his “brag book” of grandchildren. On the last visit we enjoyed together we walked arm in arm around Hornsea, discussed books and music, and he ensured that we had enough spending money to take a few gifts back for the kids. Mum said he cried when we left, and said he wouldn’t see me again. He didn’t, and we only had a few phone calls because “next week” would be better for a call. My brother had to carry him to the phone for the last call, but I am so glad that one was made! He died a week later. Procrastination had robbed me of uncountable memories.
I have one remaining aunt who has kept in touch through almost 50 years. I wonder how many times I replied to her letters. It was always in my plan, but she is 95 now, and I have missed many opportunities of asking questions, finding out more about the family background, how she and my father and uncle grew up. I lost the same opportunities on my mother’s side, irreplaceable wrong choices. Cousins who should have been closer, friends who should have remained, jewel cases of treasured memories, only a fraction of what could have been.
There is wisdom that could have been gleaned through the years instead of a legacy of mistakes made, wrong choices, a life of wandering along unmarked pathways leading nowhere, all bringing with them regrets.
Take a word of advice! Don’t do what I have done, - do what I say. Stop procrastinating, and do it!
God’s grace removes my guilt, and reshapes my life and as our Pastor reminded me this morning, I am still in the Potter’s hands! He may have to break off some of the clay, or remould a part of me. I may have to bake in the kiln, but one thing I remember – God loves me as I am, but He loves me too much to leave me as I am. He hasn’t finished with me yet.
I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.
Taste, and see that the Lord is good, blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him. (Psalm 34:4&8)
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